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According to the World Health Organization, more than 350 million people have depression.

These disturbing statistics show that there is a good chance that you have someone with depression around you.

Often times, depression strikes the people you least expect.

For example, a friend, family member, coworker, and maybe even your boss.

One of my best friends who has been a psychotherapist for many years told me that it was important to reveal something about this disease:

"one of the biggest problems people with depression face is stigma and the critical eye of others."

Indeed, many people are unaware that their behaviors and remarks can have a devastating and hurtful effect on people with depression.

Moreover, these behaviors and these words can sometimes even worsen depression.

With that in mind, here are the 20 things to remember when loving someone with depression.

All of these tips should not only help avoid the stigma of these people, but they should also help them overcome their depression.

It's not me saying it, it's my psychotherapist friend. See instead:

1. They have great strength of character

According to psychiatrist and philosopher Dr Neel Burdon, depression is synonymous with existential introspection, a search for meaning in life.

Besides, one might even think that depression is work on oneself. This is because people with depression try to make sense of their lives.

They are trying to accomplish more, fix and improve things in their life.

In addition, depression can be a way to prepare for a better future, for them and for those close to them.

It is even recognized that personalities who marked history such as Abraham Lincoln and Winston Churchill, also had to deal with depression.

When you look at it, recognizing that you have depression requires a lot of will and clarity of mind.

Therefore, depression can act as a driving force for people seeking answers to problems in their life.

Certainly, depression can push them into the darkest corners of their souls. But it is in order to uproot the weeds and bushes that hide the beauty of life.

Do not forget : depression is by no means an act of fear, cowardice or ignorance!

2. They like it when you go to them, especially when they don't expect it.

One of the most common misconceptions about depression is that people who have it want to be left alone.

At times it can be true. But it can also help to have a friend, relative or neighbor come over to say hello. Why ? Because it's actually a form of social therapy.

More and more doctors agree that one of the causes of depression is the lack of social relationships in our society and perhaps even in our families.

By overworking ourselves at work, watching too much television and overusing modern technologies, we interact less and less with other human beings.

The result is a permanent feeling of emptiness and loneliness. In fact, people with depression need companionship.

They need to see more friends, more people who come to them, more people who want to spend time with them and not the other way around.

The next time you think of someone struggling with depression, try to imagine a friendly little gesture that might make them happy.

A kind gesture to show her that you would like to spend more time with her instead of staying away from her.

When a loved one has depression, chances are they need your presence - you - more than ever.

I often think about what my mother did when I was younger and was going through difficult or lonely times: she naturally went to her siblings for help.

Indeed, family and friends are a natural remedy for depression.. Let's not forget to go to them more often.

Mother Teresa summed it up perfectly: “The most terrible poverty is loneliness and the feeling of not being loved. "

3. They don't want to be a burden on others

It is only people with depression who understand how difficult it is to have to hide your feelings and thoughts from others for fear of being ridiculed.

People with depression are acutely aware of what is going on around them.

Their perception is heightened: their perception of themselves, their thoughts, their emotions AND the behavior of others towards them.

Every day, they must struggle not to fall under the heavy burden of depression.

And there is one thing they want to avoid at all costs: that their loved ones must also bear the burden of their illness.

Therefore, people with depression tend to think of themselves as a burden on others, especially for their loved ones.

This is why they do not necessarily reach out to others and do not require more attention and encouragement.

Always remember that the main goal of people with depression is to overcome their illness.

But they want to achieve it without being a burden on others and without harming them.

Sometimes the words and behavior of people with depression can be hurtful.

If so, never forget that they are not your enemy. The real enemy is their depression.

Tell them you love them for who they are, unconditionally. And afterwards, remind them of all the positive character traits that you like about them.

4. They are not "broken" or "defective"

The human body is a very complex machine. The human body is also one of the oldest organisms on our planet.

But this does not mean that we know how to prevent it from “breaking down”.

The most complex organ in our body is the brain, which directs an incredible number of functions in our body.

The point is that we do not fully understand the causes of some forms of depression.

Maybe that's why some people tend to think of people with depression as 'defective', even weak.

But you cannot judge the "quality" of a human being just because he has depression.

It would be like judging someone because they have a big chin, because they are overweight or because they are licking. These are simply traits that do not have obvious causes.

Depression can arise in our life for a lot of different reasons.

But by no means does that mean that people with depression are psychologically "broken" or "faulty".

To really help people with depression, you have to continue to value them and see them for who they are, whole people, strong people, valuable people.

5. They are naturally philosophers

People with depression have many questions and opinions about life, happiness, and the meaning of their existence on our planet.

For them, earning money, having a good professional career or having a "good job" is not enough.

For them, living in the present moment, hoping that everything will work out, is not an option.

It's strange, but depression has the ability to broaden our perspectives, to make them more inclusive.

People with depression would like to live in a better world, a just world.

They would like to have all the answers to life's problems, and to be able to share their knowledge with as many people as possible.

But sometimes their curiosity can be their enemy. Instead of answering their questions, this curiosity can instead raise even MORE questions.

So never forget: people with depression are intelligent, curious and full of imagination.

These are qualities, not faults.

6. They are struggling with depression, and they appreciate all your support.

People with depression are fighting the biggest battle of their lives.

And during these difficult times, they need support - not criticism.

It is in the troubled times of life that friends have the power to transform into angels - and angels can save lives, literally.

The day will come when you too will have to choose between being a life saver or a life taker. Take this opportunity to save a life.

Give them your approval, your support, your encouragement and your presence.

7. They appreciate the moments of joy and laughter

What do you think is the opposite of depression? The joy, sure !

It is scientifically proven that laughter and is highly beneficial to our soul and to our health. Laughter has the same effect on people with depression.

It reminds me of the Seinfeld episode where Jerry does his comedy act to cheer up a friend in the hospital.

In the end, he makes his friend laugh so much that he ends up dying… laughing! :-)

But rest assured: your jokes and humor will never hurt family and friends with depression.

So make them laugh - and make them laugh as often as possible.

8. They are particularly sensitive to how others feel

People with depression care about others. They care about others.

They care about many things: how you feel, how you perceive them, how you see yourself, and the needs of others.

Maybe that's the problem: it's thatthey worry too much!

People with depression are caring (by the way, they are perhaps the most caring people I have ever met).

It is precisely because they have this tendency to worry a lot about others thathe It is very important to clearly communicate your needs to them.

Set boundaries with them - respectful, clear, and caring boundaries.

Also, don't forget to ask them what their limitations and needs are. Why ? Because only then can you make them understand what you are capable of giving them or not.

Indeed, to have a healthy relationship with someone suffering from depression, it is imperative to establish your limits and communicate in a clear and healthy manner.

9. They must be treated with respect

Many people with depression are stigmatized because of their illness.

However, it is not their fault: it is our society that stigmatizes them. We cannot stress this point enough.

If we could reduce the stigma of people with depression, it would help to eliminate the social difficulties associated with this disease.

Respect is more than just an action. It's a value.

Respect is being able to see beyond the depressed person and see them for who they are: a full person.

Depression is dangerous. Because it has this ability to make us forget the positive and truly remarkable qualities in people with this disease.

Never let depression hide the truth from you. Don't let her make you forget who the person with depression really is.

Therefore, do not be fooled by appearances.

Always remember to celebrate all the best, all the goodness in people who are suffering from this difficult disease.

10. They want to be treated like everyone else

No need to walk on eggshells with people with depression.

Make your life as if nothing has happened. Do you behave normally with them. Pretend your loved one is very healthy.

Sometimes just living a steady, thoughtful routine is actually all a person needs to get by.

11. They have lots of talents and they are interested in lots of things.

We all have talents and knowledge. And we all have bad breath :-)

Your loved ones who have depression certainly have knowledge, talents, things that they love to do.

And you know what ? They sure know how to do all these things really, really well!

Still don't know their talents or what interests them? So, you have just found your next mission!

Go find them out. Help them discover the things they are really passionate about.

Look for a way to increase their passions, to develop them, to cultivate them. This is what will help them erase the bad self-image associated with depression.

12. They are perfectly capable of loving and being loved

We all have the capacity to love and to be loved. And you guessed it: people with depression can love and be loved too.

It is by giving love to your loved ones that you will receive it. So treat others as you would like to be treated.

Just because someone is battling depression doesn't have to change your behavior.

And similarly, just because a person struggles with depression doesn't change their ability to love others.

His love is still there! Do not run away from this love, fill yourself with this love and you will see that there is even more of it than you thought :-)

During the rare moments of respite from the symptoms of depression, there can be wonderful moments: moments of joy, laughter, and bonding.

And if sometimes you have to be patient to enjoy these moments, remember that even in your favorite film, there are some scenes that are worse than the others.

You just have to know how to wait for the best passages.

13. They love to understand how life works

People with depression are always looking for new ways to ease their pain.

It is precisely because they are always looking for solutions thatthey are particularly good at problem-solving.

Also, don't be surprised if they are voracious readers and learn quickly.

Likewise, don't be surprised if they ask questions that cannot be easily answered.

This is a point they share with most of the leaders and pioneers in their field.

Why ? Because these people are guided by their remarkable capacities for analysis and reflection - but also by their deep convictions and values.

As you can see, the depression is far from a handicap! It is even rather a gift. A gift that unfortunately has the potential to depress!

No one has the answers to all of life's questions, nor the ability to solve all problems of injustice.

Sometimes just knowing how to ask the questions is enough.

14. They don't intend to lose the battle with depression

Fighting depression can take years. And sometimes it only takes a moment.

Either way, it's a struggle that people with depression MUST to win.

The real question is: when will this disease end? And how can we get there faster?

Their goal is to win the battle against depression. It is not about losing the battle and feeling sorry for themselves.

What is of the utmost importance is to NEVER forget that depression can be cured, and that there are plenty of resources to help them get there.

One of the first steps in fighting depression is realizing that it is there.

It is only by recognizing that it exists that we will be able to heal ourselves.

Often times, people with depression are in denial about their illness.

As a result, they spend a lot of energy trying to hide their depression and deal with it on their own without anyone's help.

15. When they are sad for no apparent reason, just be there for them

Just like the fog that suddenly falls and spoils your visibility, depression can arise at any time.

The mood of people with depression is unstable and fragile.

It's not something they can easily control: they don't have a little magic switch to turn off their moments of sadness.

It's a bit like the fog: it is not because we want it to rise that it will disappear.

Your loved ones with depression really do their best to be cheerful, pleasant, and outgoing.

And what they need is extremely simple: they need you to be there for them. They literally need your presence.

Stay next to them. Do some reading together. Watch your favorite series, together. Go have a coffee on the terrace, together.

No need for a psychiatrist, no need for a psychotherapist: just your presence is enough.

Let the fog clear, wait for the sun to rise and welcome the light of this new day.

16. They would like to have more vitality

One of the symptoms of depression is fatigue and loss of energy. But did you know thathe exercise is scientifically proven to be an excellent antidepressant ?

Maybe you've heard of the benefits of exercise for depression before, but let me add a bit more detail. It does not matter the type of sporting activity or the length of time practiced.

What is important is to make at least one 30-minute fitness walk, 3 times a week.

This is the "union minimum" to feel the antidepressant effects of sports activity.

Not that hard, is it?

When the sun is out and the breeze whispers to you to enjoy a beautiful day, invite your loved one to take a walk with you.

He may not immediately feel the beneficial effects on depression, but it is also possible that he does!

Either way, this is exactly the type of athletic activity that will increase his chances of overcoming depression - and make him feel more resilient.

17. They can be irritable - but don't take it against you

Another symptom of depression is irritability. Certainly, behaving disrespectfully towards others is inexcusable.

But when it comes to people with depression, it's important to know how to put things in perspective and try to let it go.

However, it is entirely justified (and important) to clarify your expectations andestablish your limits when dealing with someone with depression.

Establishing a line not to cross is essential to keep a healthy and harmonious relationship.

When people with depression hurt you, it's perfectly normal to let them know.

On the other hand, as with any other relationship, it is strongly advised to avoid blaming the other person during the conversation.

Just tell them what you are feeling, and that it is not what you would like to feel.

Another thing: when people with depression obviously do not want to enter into this type of discussion, do not insist. Try to come back to them once they have calmed down.

And tell them that you love them, but that you love yourself too! It's a good way to show a real example of self-esteem.

And beyond that, you also show them a healthy way of communicating and how to set limits.

18. They don't like "you should ..."

For example: "You should go out with your friends more often!" ". The “you should” for people with depression is like kryptonite for Superman!

Because of their illness, they think a lot about what they "should" do and what not to do. For them, telling themselves what they "should" do something (or not) is a sick habit.

To be perfectly clear, I'm talking about all the sentences that contain the expression “you should”.

Some examples: “You should do more sport! ". Or "You should shake yourself up!" In your place, I would do ... ”. Or again: “You should do like me. ".

Not only are these types of sentences condescending, but they also imply that the depressed person is not autonomous and that he is devoid of will.

In a nutshell, when you use sentences with "you should", people with depression think that you try to behave like their parents.

And what they REALLY don't need is to be told what they “should” do.

Instead of saying "you should" try to ask them open-ended questions as often as possible. Open-ended questions have enormous positive effects.

Open-ended questions help people with depression to take into account all the possible options and possibilities. It also helps them explore their ideas and expand their knowledge.

But when you tell them 'you should', it's just going to hold them up and it's never going to get things right.

Remember: open-ended questions are questions that cannot be answered with a "yes" or a "no".

For example, a “yes or no” question is: “Do you have a favorite color? Yes. ".

An open question was, for example: "What are your options for the future?" Hmm… ”.

19. They need all the support and encouragement of their family.

This is essential. To say that family does not help people cope with depression (or even makes it worse) is totally wrong.

In fact, there are several models of therapy that require active participation of the family or spouse. Certainly, depression makes relationships more difficult.

But it is precisely the power of these relationships that can help people with depression.

Through their relationships, they learn more about themselves.

Most importantly, this is how they learn to control their interactions with others.

In fact, one of the best ways to help people with depression is to let them know that you are there for them.

But it's not something they just have to feel: you have to communicate clearly and directly to them, face to face.

It is best to tell them something caring, something that shows you've thought about them, something that will encourage them, something that shows that they have your support. For example :

- Give sincere little compliments.

- Comment on their strengths and positive traits.

- Consider including them in your events and activities.

- Ban "you should" from your vocabulary.

- Respect their thoughts and feelings, but use open-ended questions as often as possible.

20. They need to be encouraged, not criticized

Training for parents places great emphasis on the use of the technique of renforcement positive.

To increase the likelihood of a behavior, positive reinforcement (eg, giving a compliment) is much more effective than negative reinforcement (eg, scolding or criticizing).

In any relationship, highlight the positive aspects behavior and praising is an effective and healthy way to increase the likelihood of that behavior being repeated in the future.

And for the other person who receives this compliment, it is a wonderful and very pleasant feeling.

For example: we have all been employed at some point in our lives. Well, even in a professional context, receiving a compliment for a work done or for the efforts made, increases our productivity and our dedication to this work!

Likewise, if you try to give more positive reinforcement to loved ones with depression, it will increase their self-esteem.

There you go, now you know the 20 things to NEVER forget when loving someone with depression. :-)

What do you think ? Did I forget something? Share your opinion with us in the comments. We can't wait to hear from you! :-)

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Also to discover:

12 Toxic Thoughts To Avoid For A Better Life.

13 Things Mentally Strong People Never Do.