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Whenever we pursue a goal in life, we are no longer in the present moment.

Yet it is here, in the present, that real life takes place. It's the only thing that exists. The future does not yet exist and the past is already gone.

The only really interesting time to live is the present moment. And this is usually where you will find what you are looking for.

There are people who, on the contrary, will tell you that you absolutely have to achieve certain goals or accomplish certain things if you want to be happy and be successful.

Try to take a step back from these "tips" to think about it with a rested head and especially decide for yourself.

Maybe you will have a different opinion on the reviews you were given after reading this:

1. Running after THE dream

Before you start chasing THE dream, make sure it is YOUR dream! You would be amazed how many people mistake other people's dreams for their own.

As a result, these people never get what they want because they seek to become someone they really aren't.

For example, I have a friend named Anne who spends her days at a job that she hates. She became a dental assistant because her mother wanted her to do like her older sister, Sophie.

However, Sophie, took this path because one day at college, a young girl sitting next to her said to her "why don't you become a dental assistant?" ".

A few months later, Sophie married a wealthy dentist: she never had to work. As for Anne, she has been practicing this profession for 30 years. Life is played with so little ...

Anne never reinvented herself. And she's not the only one. Many of us don't lead the lives we really want.

The first regret of people on their deathbed is that they did not pursue THEIR dreams. Don't be like them!

If your life is made up of obligations and another person’s dreams are within you, grab your courage and reinvent yourself!

Doing something you REALLY love for a few hours each week can make your life better, and even change the course of things drastically. It’s like taking your life to a new level.

2. Run after security

“In this world, nothing is certain except death and taxes. "- Benjamin Franklin

According to the dictionary, security is "the state of being protected or sheltered from harm." The problem with the constant search for security is that it doesn't exist!

And if you sell your soul for it, you will regret it for sure.

I have another friend, who is buying a house with a woman he doesn't like and who treats him badly, just to be "warm".

A friend of mine is applying for a job far below her skills, just to make sure she gets a steady paycheck, even though the last time she did that her job made her sick and she had to stay out of work for several months.

The truth is that fear of change and the desire to stay in our comfort zone at all costs hinders our personal development.

Each of us has a purpose in life. However, most of us don't realize it, because we have been forced to conform to someone else's idea of ​​us.

Thrive and take risks if you want to know what really makes your heart beat.

3. Run after money

"Pursue your passions and the money will come. Chase money and you will never find your passions. - Colin Wright

We all need to make ends meet and have fun every now and then, but chasing money has never made anyone happy.

A Buddhist monk friend told me that most of the donations for orphanages in third world countries come from wealthy people who feel a great lack in their life, as if it does not make sense.

Research conducted by psychologist and economist Daniel Kahneman and Angus Deaton, an economist at Princeton, has shown that happiness peaks at around € 70,000 per year. Beyond this amount, happiness no longer correlates with money.

Other studies also show that people are happier when they spend their money on helping other people rather than just on themselves.

Of course, we all need money to live, but chasing money for money can take you a long way from your true passions, what will make you feel fulfilled, and may leave you feeling empty.

Simplify your life, do what you love, think about others and money and happiness will follow.

4. Running after material goods

Many of us think we can be happy having a big house, wearing designer clothes, driving a new car every 5 years, and having more shoes than an entire army.

But in reality, chasing material goods is one way to fill the void in our existence.

Research shows that we are happy when we spend the money on positive experiences that leave an imprint on our soul.

It can be a beautiful spectacle, a vacation rather than interchangeable things like a new sofa or yet another necklace or bag.

So the next time you want to redecorate your living room or change your car, consider taking a trip, going to the theater or taking a road trip instead.

5. Running after work

“Beware of the poverty of a busy life. "- Socrates

Americans pass the most time at work to accumulate the number of lowest paid leave of all developed countries.

And those who are lucky enough to still have a job have added an extra day to their workweek because now they check their emails and work calls from home.

Is this what awaits us in France as well? Are we condemned to inevitably squeeze in what we could not do at work in our free time and put our privacy aside?

The second regret of those on their deathbed is that they worked too hard and too hard.

Numerous scientific studies show that taking breaks throughout the day leads to better productivity than working long hours.

Ditto for holidays: they are necessary for your health and ultimately benefit your working life. You come back in better shape, able to do more in less time.

So instead of working like a madman and always doing more in a life already too busy to make up for lost time, try slowing down, meditating, doing yoga, taking a walk, chatting with friends, keep a diary and enjoy nature. You will be happier and healthier.

6. Running after the perfect beauty

“To have beautiful eyes, look at the beauty in other people's eyes. To have beautiful lips, only say beautiful things and to look beautiful, walk with the knowledge that you are never alone. "- Audrey Hepburn

A lot of men and women put a lot of pressure on themselves to look good. As a result, we go to the gym, dye our hair, and even do corrective surgery.

In 2010, 511,000 cosmetic surgery operations took place in France. The problem is, physical beauty fades over time. What we should be chasing after is inner beauty.

My partner at the gym is a woman in her sixties. And she is one of the most beautiful women I know. She eats well, she takes care of herself and also focuses her attention on people in need to make the world she lives in a better place. She just shines.

7. Running after the youth

“You are never too old to set another goal or dream of a new dream. "- C.S. Lewis

We live in a society obsessed with youth: many of us panic when we look in the mirror and see in our reflection our eyelids droop and gray hair.

Nothing lasts forever and that's good. When we run after youth, we often lose sight of the fact that with age comes wisdom. We learn from our mistakes, make better choices, and are more true to ourselves.

Rather than trying to find the Fountain of Youth, focus your energy on following your heart. It's never too late. Martin P. Levin realized his dream of going to law school at the age of 61. He is still practicing law at 90 years old.

Pierre-Auguste Renoir, suffering from arthritis, continued to paint with a brush attached to his hand. What would you do if you had the courage to know what you can accomplish, regardless of your age? This is where your true vitality resides.

8. Run after approvals

“Remember, you don't have to explain or prove anything to anyone. If people don't accept you for who you are, then it's time to move on. "- Cath B Akesson

Seeking people's approval is a waste of time and energy. What we need to look for is our own approval.

The third regret of people on the verge of death is that they did not have the courage to express their true feelings, that they did not know how to take responsibility for their choices and that they buried them in order to keep the peace around them.

You haven't done anything wrong. Some people don't like you, or buy into your ideas, that's all. This is not why you have to change.

The second wonderful effect of self-acceptance is that all of those little things you wanted to improve about yourself eventually change on their own. Self-hatred blocking you? Self-acceptance will heal you.

9. Running after love

" I love my husband. I knew this was my true love because with him I could really be myself. - Idina Menzel, American actress, singer and songwriter.

When you search for love, in too overtly a way, you more often than not attract the wrong people. Most likely, you end up with a narcissist who demands constant admiration and attention but gives you nothing in return.

This frantic search for love therefore becomes unhealthy and exhausting. And you end up hurting yourself.

True love comes knocking on your door when you stop looking for it outside of you and instead focus on yourself, accepting your shortcomings and your good qualities. What can you do to be more authentic and finally accept yourself?

Maybe you could sign up for an improv drama class, learn to draw, or join a hiking group.

This will increase the chances of meeting like-minded people. When you reveal yourself as you are, rather than hiding, you are giving love a real opportunity to meet you.

10. Running after people

“Don't run after people. Be yourself. Do what you have to do and work hard. The right people - the ones who will truly belong in your life - will come to you. And will stay. "- Will Smith

If you have to struggle to maintain a relationship or friendship, it's probably best to let that person go. Not all relationships are healthy. Learn to tell the difference.

According to George Simon, the author of Sheep’s Clothing, beware of people who try to control you, who break your ego to get what they want, lie, ignore you, make you feel guilty, put you down, play the victim or make you doubt yourself.

These "vampires" drain you of your energy. If you honestly assess your current friendships and family members, chances are you will spot one or two.

Rather than chase after them and try to maintain those relationships at all costs, put some distance between you and them. And get closer to your real friends.

The 4th regret of people who are going to die is that they were too busy to see their friends as much as they would have liked.

A true friend is someone you can turn to for sympathy, advice, support or a loving ear when you need them, who you can confide in almost anything and who you can be yourself with. .

You don't have to run after them because they're already there. Keep in touch with them and give them your undivided attention.

11. Run after what's trending

“Ask yourself what makes you tick, then do it. Because the world needs people alive! - Howard Thurman

The consumer societies we live in encourage us to buy more and more things. So we are always tempted to buy the latest trending gadget, to follow the latest fashion.

The problem is, if we're always chasing the latest fury, we can lose track of who we really are and what keeps us going.

Another friend of mine named David was tired of being a lawyer. He realized that what he really wanted was to be a photographer.

He started taking pictures during his lunch break, after work, and eventually he managed to sell a few. Taking beautiful photos gives meaning to his life and fills him with joy.

Be a free thinker and go to whomever fuels your inner fire. It could be listening to music from the 60s, watching old movies, writing, painting, taking pictures….

And if you end up buying a new camera, remember that taking pictures is what turns you on, not the camera itself.

12. Running after happiness

“I don't have to look for extraordinary times to find happiness. He's there, right there if I'm giving him my attention and knowing how to be grateful. - Brené Brown

Running after happiness by working hard today for rewards tomorrow doesn't make people any happier.

Happiness is a choice. To find it, do what gives you immediate pleasure AND helps you achieve your important long-term goals.

The 5th regret of people on their deathbed is that they would have liked to give themselves the choice to be happier. Instead, they got stuck in old patterns that they pretended to be happy with when they weren't.

Be honest with yourself and strategize to be happy doing things you love, every day. This will allow you to lead to a life that is truly who you are. Be aware of your luck and follow your happiness.

There you go, now you know the 12 things to stop running to be happy :-)

What about you, are you going to try to stop chasing these things? Or maybe you know other things to stop chasing? Let us know what you think in the comments. We can't wait to hear from you! :-)

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Also to discover:

8 Things To Tell Your Children To Make Them Happy.

8 Things Happy People Do Differently.